Entertainment

Starscopes: Katy Perry Proves Love Wins At The Witness Tour!

Surprise proposal! Queer couple engaged onstage at Katy Perry Witness Tour at Barclay’s Center!

Gather round, sparkle squad. EPIC news from tonight from Katy Perry Witness Tour.

Chief Executive Belieber and Fairy Boss Mother had pit tickets tonight to Katy Perry’s Witness Tour at Barclay’s Center – but that’s not the big news.

Sometime after Katy Perry flew in giant planet singing Thinking of You, dressed in a sequin caftan and the same silver beaded wig my mom wore on New Year’s Eve 1989, and before she sang Goddess, she also CALLED A COUPLE ONSTAGE FOR A SURPRISE PROPOSAL.

katy perry witness tour

Katy asked if anyone needed to make a wish on shooting star that she happened to pluck from the sky. Obviously we all screamed because, yes, in 2017 we all have some major wishes to make. But she didn’t pick anyone from the pit. Instead, a super cute lesbian couple came onstage, wearing matching clear glasses. One woman was even named Katie – and we were all OMG, COINCIDENCE. Except it was not a coincidence, because it was also the birthday of Becky, Katie’s girlfriend. There are no accidents when it comes to love!

THEN, Katie took Katy Perry’s mic, dropped to one knee and PROPOSED TO HER GIRLFRIEND, BECKY. Katie described Becky as “beautiful even without makeup, as you all can see,” and all of Barclay’s Center went, “awwwwww.” Then she said, “Will you marry me,” and I swear we were all ON THE FLOOR DYING FROM, LOVE, EVEN KATY PERRY WHO WAS TRYING TO GET OUT OF THE WAY BUT YOU CAN’T HIDE IN SEQUINS. Becky does have good hair, btw.

Better yet, it is National Coming Out Day. Love wins. We all win. LOVE IS REAL AND KATY PERRY IS A GODDESS.

Congratulations to Katie and Becky!

Starscopes is a series wherein Cinderly’s Fairy Boss Mother divines the cosmic meaning behind the movements of the stars and other celebrities.

About the author

Laura von Holt, Fairy Boss Mother

Laura von Holt is the Fairy Boss Mother of Cinderly. Her goal in life is to lead the first fairy godmother empire, be the Lisa Frank of the Digital World, and make magic real for sparkle unicorns and boss ladies everywhere. A triple threat, Laura is a Pulitzer Prize contender, a Certified Fairyologist and a graduate of Weeki Wachee Sirens of the Deep mermaid camp. She writes romance novels under the pen name of Laura Lovely.

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